The Laughing Wolf

A Follow-Up To Marriage

First, I want to thank everyone who took the time to e-mail me, pro or con. Almost every post I received was rational, well-thought, and well-presented. I don’t know if it was a function of having to take the extra time to write, but what I received made me proud and gives me hope for the continuation of rational discourse in America (and the world).

Second, I do need to point out that I never gave my views on marriage. I provided an overview of a portion of the historic development of that institution. That information comes from multiple citable sources. Yet, I never once gave my views on what marriage means to me. The short version is that I am a romantic and want the happily-ever-after. The long version is a post for another day.

Third, I make no claims to being a theologian, and plead a certain amount of ignorance. That ignorance, however, is not willful. I was raised in the Methodist church, and started bible study at a very early age. This probably was something the pastor we had at the time came to regret, as I had a tendency to ask very hard questions in all innocence, which only made it worse for him I think. A very nice and well-meaning man, he was not the brightest bulb and took to avoiding me and my questions.

The two people who had the most to do with some of my development in matters spiritual, other than my parents, were my ninth grade history teacher and a Jesuit priest. Both of these individuals put me on the path of critical thinking. The teacher knew me, and knew that I had some very romantic notions of the Catholic Church. His answer was to assign me a term paper topic that caused me to do some digging, some deep thinking, and to remove some blinders. The priest I met on a long train trip through Italy when I was 12. There is just something about the Jesuits that has the desire to teach ingrained in them. He taught that day, and it was only much later that I realized that in discussions of the countryside, history, and language that he had planted yet more seeds of critical thinking.

Over the years, my interest in and studies of matters religious and spiritual have led me to some interesting people. I have much enjoyed talks, discussions, and debates with priests, ministers, theologians, scholars, and others. A fun assignment that I will share, and highly recommend, is to read the Bible as a novel. The idea takes a little getting used to, but once you do it provides an interesting perspective.

Unlike many children in the South, I had ready access to some Jewish thought and scholarship as well, through family acquaintances. Because of the large number of food allergies I had as a child, there were many things I could not eat, such as wheat, corn, rice, rye, etc. I could eat potatoes and other foods that just happened to be Kosher, and these kind people included me and my family in their runs to Atlanta for supplies. I learned of Orthodox, Reformed, and other divisions at an early age (along with some interesting phrases in another language). It is fascinating to study Kosher requirements, and see that they block the spread of parasites and disease, and help reduce the chance of food poisoning.

Other faiths continued to fascinate me, and I was given some encouragement to explore them. Such requirements were one of the more fun parts of earning the God and Country Award in the Boy Scouts.

It was ironic that there was no Methodist version of that award and that I earned the Episcopal, as in my junior year of High School I switched to the Episcopal Church. It was a dreary story of a sky pilot who finished cementing my intense distaste for certain types who wear the cloth in any faith. The Episcopal minister was the father of some classmates, and was a wonderful person with whom to talk. I have written of him before, and he also encouraged me to continue my studies. He was most thought provoking, never belittled the fact that years earlier I had given consideration to becoming a monk, and was surprisingly patient. Yes, I did indeed have a childhood infatuation with the idea of becoming a monk (quit laughing Borzoi!).

So, I have studied a bit over the years and will note that my post of yesterday was in no way disrespectful of any aspect of Christian faith. Indeed, what some took to be disrespectful is quite fully discussed in a number of theological and scholarly sources. Sex and sensuality does play a role in scripture and in doctrine, and as such is well discussed. My paragraph of yesterday is simply an extremely concise summation of some of it. As for my comments regarding divorce and such, they are nothing compared to what is being said by ministers and priests within the faith. I believe one such was recently referenced on Winds of Change, and I know he was cited by Cardinal Puppileiu. His post was far more scathing than my simple statements of fact.

I do want to thank Dan Darling, however, for pointing out a mistake. I only had about 30 minutes in which to write that post, with the result that one thing in particular was not made clear. I listed polygamy in a series of “bad things” and failed to make clear that it is a bad thing simply in terms of U.S. law. I failed to state and explain that point properly, and am glad for the chance to correct it. The posts I write here do get short shrift, as my time has to go into paying writing, with the result that I do make mistakes in word choice, words, and spelling. I trust you will forgive those errors when they do occur.

As a matter of philosophy, I have no problem with polygamy. Nor do I have any problem with line, group, or other forms outside the norm. So long as all parties consent to the situation, and thus know what they are getting into, there is no problem with it. The key here is consent, informed consent, as I do not feel any practice that is consensual is any of anyone else’s business. It most especially is not the business of the Republic. I also find the arguments linking polygamy and incest to be a bit specious, but that again is a post for another day. For some good comments on this, look for what Jay Solo (recently married, lucky dog) says at his site and in comments at Winds of Change.

This raises a point that came up several times and in several places: other areas that need help. Members of the BDSM community face loss of children, security clearances, and jobs for their consensual practices. In a non-sexual context, so too do nudists/naturists. There are other alternative lifestyles and thoughts that face this same type of persecution, and make no mistake about it: It is persecution. It is discrimination. It is wrong.

Another important point was raised in a letter, and it does deserve some serious consideration. There are some, real extremists, who would push to force churches to perform gay marriages. How do we protect them? Case law used to provide for such, and it has been made clear over the years that Faiths may not be forced to perform acts abhorrent to them within their sanctuary. However, anti-cult laws have eroded some of those protections, and open the door for just such abuse. Current debate gives us an opportunity to consider this, and to make sure that whatever comes in the form of law ensures the sanctity and rights of all faiths.

Yes, that does mean “cults” as well. One of the oddest blessings of our Republic and the Constitution is that it allows Citizens to make stupid choices and mistakes. People can make good choices, and reap the rewards, or they can make stupid choices, and pay the price. You, as an individual, can help them if you choose, but nowhere in the Constitution is there a freedom from consequences. This echos the Bible very strongly, for the heart of that book is that unto me (and all others) is given a choice, to accept (and reap the rewards of paradise) or to reject (and spend eternity in torment).

To sum up before the half hour is up, though I am not gay I do support the right to gay marriage/unions. It in no way harms the Republic, but is in fact living up to the challenge of the Constitution. It in no way forces any Faith to recognize or countenance same, and in fact can be used to strengthen the independence of all Faiths from government interference and control. There are other positives, but that will do for now. The bell tolls, and the workday starts.

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