The Laughing Wolf

A Long But Rewarding Trip

Sorry for the long silences, but life has been interesting. Work is keeping me very, very busy but the results should be worth all the sweat and pain -- some of it literal. That said, I found myself having to take a couple of days for a trip, a trip I did not want to make. Yes, I have wanted to go back South to visit friends and select blood-of-my-blood. Yes, I have wanted to see certain places and do some things. But, not for this reason. This trip was to say goodbye to some while there was time.

As Elisson points out, that visit comes to us all, sometimes unexpected, sometimes well known and planned for, and sometime a welcome relief. In this case, it was to visit some relatives and friends that might not be around for another visit, even were I to go back next week. And, to see some others who might get that unexpected visit.

I've dealt with both over the years. One year in high school was the year of funerals for me, something on the order of better than one a month. It was then that I truly began to say goodbye to people as if it was the end, something I share in common with Tammi and some others. It can be as simple as saying "I love you" to a bit more; or, it can be a cat's goodbye, quietly withdrawing and saying much without words.

Since then, I've gone to more funerals and sat at more bedsides than I care to consider right now. Of the two options, I've decided that I much prefer the "unexpected visit" as Elisson calls it, as it oft is the most merciful to the person involved. While knowing that departure is coming allows time to take care of things and say all that need be said, it also comes coupled with a lot of suffering on the part of the person making the departure. Not to mention a lot of emotional pain to those who care for them.

One thing I did was to try to add in as many "good" visits as I could. It was already a marathon trip, so why not make the most of it?

The first day saw me driving about 15 hours to get some items from some former property of mine, and then driving on over to the Greenville, SC area. That next day, Friday morning, found me meeting up with the wonderful Webers. David and Sharon are wonderful people, and it was great to get to see them and the kids again -- not to mention Meg and getting to meet some of the four-legged family members. They introduced me to a very nice Thai restaurant as well. Thank you all for such a wonderful visit, and David did share a bit about his new series of novels with me. More on that soon...

I then drove down to Atlanta, glad to be headed south and not caught up in the gridlock headed north, and met Mr. C and Kiltbaby (and Clara's boy) at Saigon Cafe. It was good to be back with what is a second family to me, and the food was delicious. We retired to Clara's house (Clara the cat being the true owner, just ask her), did a small amount of running around, and visited. Less than five hours in the car that day.

At 0530 Saturday morning, I got up and was on my way down to Macon for some visits. I had breakfast with a family friend, and got to visit with the lady I call my Stepmom. Two relatives I had hoped to visit were not in, but I do hope to catch them later. After a brief stop to pick up some food and some ribs to bring back (from Fresh Air, the best ribs I have had anywhere in the world), I went to a family reunion. I got to see the relative with cancer, who is doing far better than any of us could have hoped. I got to see a number of people I had not expected, which was good. I found out that my cousin the firefighter is now my cousin the RN and happily working trauma.

I then said goodbyes to all and went to say a final goodbye. Miss A, as I will call her, really got me interested in baking and over the years we have cheerfully had many discussions about cooking, baking, and more. As someone noted at the reunion, this is the family that cooks and she was good within the family. I had known that she had gone to a retirement community, but was unprepared for how far down she had gone. It reminded me strongly of her father and mother in their final years, and was bittersweet to say goodbye for what I feel will be the final time.

Then, it was back on the road for a much more pleasant meeting. Despite massive traffic jams from Macon all the way back up to Atlanta, I made it back just a few minutes late (had to get the ribs into the refrigerator at Clara's) to a blogmeet of sorts.

A few years ago, I made it to Helen for a couple of hours to meet Jim of the Great Hair, Acidman, and a few others. One of those others I met, briefly, was the Grouchy Old Cripple, who didn't remember the event. I still say it was because he (and others) fled screaming when Eric began yodelling the Loch Tay Boat Song. This time, I wanted to spend a bit of time with Denny, and he was kind enough to get a few others together. We met at a very nice restaurant (thanks SWMBO!) where I also got to finally meet Elisson and SWMBO, Zonker, and Dax Montana. It was a great evening, and I thank all of them for it. In fact, it was good enough that I was quite late getting "home" and still didn't want it to end. To be honest, I hope to have the chance for some one-on-one conversation with all of them soon. Good food, great conversations, and interesting discussions on who's was bigger and could hold more wine. Just Damn! It was a great time.

0530 saw me up again on Sunday, and after a good conversation with Mr. C, I set off north to have breakfast with Eric. I made it just a bit ahead of the original estimated time, and had a good time discussion on backstops and more with Eric. I also checked out his new wheels, and I must say I think they are him. It was also disconcerting to look around and agree with him that we were in the best shape of anyone there...

Back on the road and back to the lair about 1930 hours, for a bit over 12 hours on the road that day. My thanks to all who helped make this a much better trip. It was good to meet new people and friends, and to visit with established friends (for we are not old!).

Keep in mind that ultimate visitor, and make the most of all trips and visits before then. Live your life with passion and reason, say your goodbyes as if they be the last, and love with abandon. For one day each of us has that final visit, that final dance and kiss. I've danced with her a couple of times and hope that we simply continue to flirt for now, and urge you to the same. Make the most of life and love, for the day comes when the dance ends and the kiss is given, and the time to let people know what you think and what they mean is before.

LW

Remember

This day, remember those on Challenger, and all those who have died climbing the skies. I refuse the 73-second meme, and hope that they were indeed unconscious as they tumbled to the sea that day -- for I am no longer as sure of that as once I was. This day, remember not just them or one special teacher, but remember all who haved died taking us to the skies and the stars. Each is imporant, each is worth remembering, and each is worth honoring for the sacrifice they and their friends and families have made. On this day, think of them all.

LW

If Christmas Happened Today...

I am laughing my head off at this, but part of that is to keep from crying. When you think about it, though, it is not surprising that the super-PC crowd gets their knickers sucked up in a bunch over Christmas as the story violates every major shibboleth of the PC testament. Thanks, I think, to Deb for this one.

LW

They Pay Them

TGOO makes a good point and I fully agree with his final two words. I also think that my headline is the answer to his initial question.

LW

Tribes

I am trying to do the impossible in an extremely short amount of time, not helped by the office sinus thing trying to beat me up (necessitating, of course, that I beat it up). Fortunately, great words are not needed from me right now because the incomparable Bill Whittle has up a must-read essay on Tribes.

Go.

LW

Assistance And Preparations

Take a moment today, and think how good you have it. Here, the sun is shining in a bright blue sky, the mood is peaceful, and despite a cold/sinus infection trying to start up, life is good. It is very good. Think about how well you have it: a roof over your head, meals, and all those things we take for granted.

Now think about how others have it: no home left, no shelter, no A/C, little or no food or water, nor the means to get any. Portions of Alabama, Mississippi, and Louisiana are just flat out gone. Set aside New Orleans for a minute, for it is only one part of the devastation. A portion of the United States larger than many countries is going to have to be rebuilt from the ground up. That is a massive effort, and requires a massive amount of help.

Take a moment today, and make a difference. My charity of choice is Soldier's Angels Operation Katrina Soldiers Relief Fund. That said, there are two other very worthy charities that could use your help: Mennonite Disaster Service which goes in and helps individual families clean up and rebuild, and the Humane Society which is going in and helping both the pets left behind, and the care givers to animals of all types.

A good and special person in my life has asked that I also remind one and all of Noah's Wish as well. I almost went with this organization, but was much more familiar with the Humane Society. Check it out, and if you like it and it meets your requirements for safe and responsible giving, give.

Give to all of the above. I have already made a donation, and plan to do more as soon as I can. If you have made a donation because of this site, please be sure to log your contribution.

Yet, amidst all the need, take some time to think of yourself and your family. How prepared are you?

If you can, take the time and read all the posts in the preparedness category. At least take the time to read about power and light, bugging out, snivel gear for bugging out, and start here for preparedness week. That's right, an entire week's worth of posts on practical and rational preparedness. Blogfather Joe has a must read post on bug-out papers as well as a repost of his take on bug out kits.

Take a moment today. Help Others. Help Yourself. Ultimately, your fate and your safety lie with you.

LW

Food For Friend

A few weeks ago, I had a conversation with a friend whom I have not seen in several years. We agreed that too long was too long, and that opportunities were meant to be seized less they be impossible later. So, the result is -- despite getting an e-mail entitled "Help, I'm Lost" before they ever left home -- a nice visit. I know how I am spending my day, how about you? How about taking some time, making some time, for friends old and new? Think about it, but don't take too long, just go and do.

LW
off to practice what he preaches...

The Gift: My Stalker

The Gift: My Stalker

Earlier, I wrote about giving gifts and touched on the greatest gift of all: love. It is the best gift to give or to get, but it can be uncomfortable. A stalker I have acquired have brought it home to me.

Ginger, a local barn/feral cat, has decided I am wonderful. She twines about my feet and legs, hides in my bushes and greets me when I go out, and has even taken to waiting out on my back deck for me. I come home smelling of wolves, and still she loves me. It is an offering of love that makes me uncomfortable, and not just because I am allergic to cats.

When someone offers love like this, it makes us all the more aware of our own shortcomings. Let's face it, we know we don't deserve it. We are not worthy of it.

No one is. That's the beauty of the gift, we get it not by earning, but simply by being. We get it not because we deserve it, but because another feels we merit it. It is the ultimate gift, and when it comes into our lives, we are very much the richer for accepting that gift.

Set aside your problems and hang-ups, and take the gift freely given. For true love is given without conditions or demands.

LW

Food For Thought: Black Dogs And Storms

BloodSpite has a great post up on racing storms and fighting the Black Dog. It hit a nerve with me on several levels, as the Black Dog has also been with me this last week. By rights, it should not have been, for I have a new home and many good things personal and professional. Yet, I am not satisfied and even a bit disappointed with some things. One in particular is being denied enlistment in the Guard because of age. If anyone has any pull, I have appealed. Yes, I know that joining could cost me the house and even some of my possessions, as well as my career. I am willing to do that. Another cause for the Dog is some fear in regards an old enemy who may be trying to out maneuver me. I need to suck it up and deal with it, and think I am set to do so. Thanks, BloodSpite, for the push, and the most excellent post that everyone should read, images and all.

LW

The Gifts We Give

The subject of gifts has come up repeatedly in the last couple of days, and has sparked a train of thought that seems appropriate for feeding thought this Saturday. Indeed, literal feeding has sparked part of this.

Too often today, the definition of a gift is deliberately misrepresented by far too many people. What is presented is not a gift, something given without expectation of any benefit, but a bribe or payment in exchange for something. A birthday "gift" is given in expectation of an even better "gift" being presented later in return. A "gift" of jewelry or some other expensive item is presented in expectation of sex or other form of paid companionship. A "gift" of sex or other commodity is presented in exchange for protection or otherwise living a certain lifestyle of material comfort. The list can and does go on almost ad infinitum these days.

In re-reading at breakfast this morning the book We Few by David Weber and John Ringo, I was struck by the following exchange:

"A person's conscience is her own," Despreaux said stubbornly.
"Heaven's bells, if it is," Koustic said caustically. "We spend most of our lives doing things because we know they're the right things to do in other people's eyes."

Think about this, and how the rampant corruption of the concept of a gift begins to make more sense. Add in the concept of guilt and general unworthiness a la so-called yuppie guilt and similar ilk, and the conflict and confusion engendered by the receipt of gifts becomes a bit clearer.

From the time we can begin to toddle around, we are being told that we are unworthy, that we don't deserve all the good things in our lives. From starving children in X and oppression in Y, we have it so lucky and we really don't deserve it unless and until everyone else has as much or better is a constant message. The logical fallacies of such are left as an academic exercise to the reader, for while we know it to be false intellectually, emotionally we are extremely susceptible to it. It is pounded into us and operates on a subconscious level, for at least as long as we let it.

I am no more immune to it than anyone else. I have been reluctant to accept offers of service from others because I fear incurring an obligation. Knowing that for what it is does not necessarily change things, for it resonates in us on a deep emotional level. I have seen the same in others, when I have offered them service, food, or simple hospitality. "What do they really want?" shows up very clearly in face, body language, and action.

As for me, what I really want is to give pleasure to others, to meet new people, and perhaps to build some new friendships. If some of that becomes more, then that is merely a bonus. What I do not want to do is to take part in the misrepresentation of a "gift" to anyone, for I would rather have the honesty and integrity to purchase openly that which is desired, be it sex or whatever, than to obtain it under false pretenses.

Most of all, I want to avoid the ultimate trap of giving or getting "gifts" in exchange for the illusion of love. Love truly is the ultimate gift, given freely and without expectation of reward. It can not be bought or sold, merely given. It is also the hardest true gift to accept, for rarely does anyone feel they truly deserve it, simply because it is given without reservation or expectation not just from the heart, but the soul. It is an honor to be offered that part of a person, and also a good way to tell if the person truly is offering love, for it comes with no strings or demands. When offered that true gift, accept it even if you don't believe you deserve it, for to decline it hurts only you in the end, and indicates some problems with your own heart and soul. Rejecting an honestly given gift of love is to reject all love from all sources.

Today, think about the gifts you give and why you give them. Are you truly giving gifts? Or, are you making payment as you would for any commercial transaction? Are you letting cynicism prevent you from accepting true gifts?

Do you go with the herd, or do you give and accept gifts as they were meant to be?

LW

Static Vs. Dynamic Life

In several arenas of late, I have had to deal with people who don't like change. To be honest, it is in several cases much more than that: open hositility is putting it politely. The fear is palpable, for what they have always done is being changed, and they want to stay with what they have always done out of a fear of the unknown, a fear of additional work, and a fear of growth.

Actually, I empathize more than some would ever believe. I like comfortable ruts myself, but ruts rarely take you to new and better places. Ruts never provide growth, but merely conformity and a continuation of the same-old, same-old. Ruts, like game trails, are a trap of the self and an open invitation to intellectual or physical ambush. However comfortable and comforting, ruts are a prison to the mind and soul.

So think on this today: are you resisting change in your life because the change will bring true harm, or because the "bad" simply means that you may have to do something different and learn new things?

Just some food for thought for the day.

LW

Just Some Quick Thoughts

1. Why should you care what those whom you don't respect think of you? I mean other than those in your chain of command? Are they worth getting upset over? FWIIW, laughing at them is the best thing for you, and about the worst thing you can do to them...

2. It is going to be hot in a lot of North America today. Be careful.

3. Isn't it a great world in it that has so many kind people like Craig at mtpolitics!

LW
off to work on the new lair while it is still semi-cool...

Enjoy The Small Pleasures And Triumphs

It has been one heck of a week. Loss, pain, loss again, rotten politics at work, and behind -- waaaay behind -- on work at the lair because of a change in the schedule. Enough to put one off one's feed if you let it.

Yet, that change in schedule means that I spent my first night in the new lair, camped on an air mattress in the basement. Other than some spider issues, actually kind of fun. Even have the broadband up and the router sort of working. The loss(es) have caused me to appreciate what I have and what good people have brought into my life. Politics are never fun, but it is making me think and actually giving me some additional freedom to maneuver.

You can spend your time focused on the negative, or you can look at the rest of the picture -- and the rest is usually a lot larger than the bad.

Which perspective do you choose?

LW

Take Time Today

The joy of any new job, trip, or visit is to meet new people. At my new job, one of the true delights was meeting R.

On the surface, you would think that it might have been anything but. To the left, R. To the right, wolf. An aging hippy who didn't trust companies, capitalism, or many other institutions to be honest about it. Yet, things clicked.

R was into discourse and was always willing to consider new things, and was widely read to boot. We might agree to disagree on things, but each considered what the other had to say and looked at facts. Besides, when it came to the things that really mattered, we agreed. You do right by your people, your word is your bond, and individuals have a right to choose -- even if they make a stupid choice. Thoughts on management, management issues, styles, and politicians were remarkably similar.

Some of his outlook and politics were shaped by his service in Vietnam. His was not a good one, yet he understood that there were times to fight and to kill. He didn't like it, but he knew it was necessary and he respected those who served.

A talented artist, his design work and portraits were good. We have been having fun the last few weeks teasing a younger, callow member of the office with talk of sex, drugs, and rock and roll from the 60s on. R knew exactly what he was doing, and though he never showed it, he took great delight in making this person's eyes get big and round. It was fun to help on this. Another fan of the Goofy Gophers, he was Tosh to my Mac, and our "Oh no, after you!" bemused those ignorant of such high art.

We briefly considered, before sanity returned, putting the new roof on the new lair. Hard work and labor did not scare him, as evidenced by his willingness to help unload the truck yesterday. Some of the fine trim painting was to be his, too.

Yesterday, I came home and got a call. Thursday evening, R had started feeling bad and had gone to his neighbors. While there, things got worse and he asked them to call a doctor. By the time the paramedics arrived, he was gone.

I am not one to make friends easily. I have a lot of acquaintances, a much smaller number of friends, and a group of what I call true friends that can pretty much be counted on one hand. True friends I trust with my life, and even my death. R had already gone into the friend category, and was headed, I think, for true friend.

Take the time today to appreciate those in your life. You know not how long you will have them.

LW

Hang tight, my friend. I will see you where the fields are green, the demons gone, and the party long.

Drive, Impatience, And Responsibility

What drives you, and are those drives good for you?

This has been a subject brought home to me this week because of work and progress on the new lair. Or, rather, the lack of planned/hoped-for progress. I like to get things done and can be very focused and driven in completing projects or doing anything, sometimes more so than is healthy. In my case, I know that a lot of my drive comes from having been told that I would not reach 18 nor ever be as good as "normal" kids. Such can leave one with an overwhelming desire to experience as much as possible, and to finish things from projects to books because tomorrow may never come. It has also meant a tendency to push too hard, to rush such that things are simply done, rather than done right or to the best of one's ability. Such is also why I have a very strong and negative reaction to complacency and anyone who tells me that I have years to do something. To my mind, though I am long past 18, time is limited and always will be so.

The things that drive me have positive aspects too, but the negative are things to watch and change. So what drives you, or causes you to have a lack of drive? What parts are positive, and which are negative? Stop and think a bit, and then start working on ways to reduce the negative. It makes for a happier and healthier life.

LW

Food For Thought: Appearances

Yesterday, I had to attend a meeting and was amazed at the smell in and around the building where it was held. It took a bit to realize that the beautiful flowering trees nearby were the source of the sewer-like smell.

Appearance is only part of a package. How often have fair looks deceived? Not just with people, but with everything from structures to candy? How often has each of us been taken in by how something looked, only to find that what was inside left much to be desired?

LW
thankful that none of the sewer trees are planted at his place...

Manners

The late philosopher and author Robert Heinlein once described manners as the oil for the social machine (social lubricant?). Are you doing all you can to teach others about good manners, by instruction and -- far more importantly -- by example? Just something to think about this Saturday...

LW

None So Blind

T1G also reminded me with this post to go check out Techography (a good read) and this post from BloodSpite. It is well worth the read, and some strong food for thought.

LW

Friends

Today, I have the pleasure of spending time with new friends. I have been so lucky to meet so many wonderful people, and this blog has been a part of that.

Yet, it is more than the blog: It is a willingness to take chances, to open doors, and to put myself into a position to meet people. This is not easy, especially for one as cautious as I can be. Yet, the rewards are enormous and far outweigh the disadvantages.

Are you taking that chance, opening yourself up to new people and new friends? If not, why not? The only person you short-change that way is yourself.

LW

Celebrating A Life

Michele at Letters From NYC has had a very rough week (plus). Yet, in the midst of it, she did something wonderful, and I highly recommend that you read about the celebration of life she just oversaw. What a wonderful thing. Go, read it now and extend your support and sympathies, too.

LW

An Evening With The Arts

Alright, I am a snob and I will admit it. One of the fastest ways to get me not to attend a cultural event is to append the word "Modern" to it. Having gone, or been dragged, to a number of exhibitions and such over the years, I am very much of the opinion that modern art isn't. Indeed, one of the paintings hanging in the lair is a reaction to one such exhibition, but that is a story for another day.

Friday evening saw me going to a modern dance exhibition at one of the nearby institutions of higher learning. I knew that it would be a fun evening just because of the crowd I was with, but it was much more than that -- it was good. The dance was well choreographed, the musical selection very interesting, and the dancing was very well done. About four dancers caught my eye to the point I asked about them, and was not surprised to find that one of the four had some serious experience. To do some of what was done, and make it appear to be effortless, takes skill.

As some food for thought, how often do you take advantage of opportunities to see new things? I know I'm glad I went.

LW

I Must Beg To Differ

In this column, the Fatherly Curmudgeon takes to task those -- like me -- who qualified comments in regards the death of the Pope. While he, as always, makes some very good points, I think he missed one. Consider that some of us may have refused to disrespect a good and complex man by reducing him to a one-dimensional cardboard cutout.

I acknowledged my disagreements with him as a way of acknowledging that he was a complex and dynamic man who deserves praise and full consideration, a consideration not possible in a short paragraph or three. Indeed, books will be deservedly written and will fail to do the topic justice.

Yes, we should speak well of the dead, but it is a mark of contempt to reduce them to a caricature in the process. The dead deserve better.

That said, I will acknowledge that most of the media coverage I have been avoiding does not seem to be doing this, but rather attacking and tearing down while pretending to say good things. On that score, I find Father Curmudgeon's word and position very well taken.

LW

Saturday Thoughts

Well, this is written Friday but putting it up whilst I do have some connectivity. My day is done, and it has been a long one. A good one, but a long one. Long work day, but with some satisfaction involved. The investment of an hour or so has resulted in finding a doctor that I will give a try -- still a bit gunshy given the GP I had in Huntsville (the Ortho who fixed things I highly recommend). Finally, I invested about three hours Friday evening in cooking a special dinner to take to Wolf Park for the Interns, Practicums, and Staff: grilled boneless leg of lamb, grilled asparagus, grilled onion, grilled corn on the cob, roast garlic and cheddar cheese mashed potatoes, and almond shortbread for dessert. Took pictures, so may do a photo recipe entry this week if I can get connected.

I find lamb most appropriate for this time of year, and it became something of a tradition in my household for a while.

For those of you who are Christian, I wish you joy this weekend.

For those pagan, Bright Blessings Be.

For both, this is a time of new growth, of renewal, of new life. Think on that this weekend, for that is truly a feast of food for thought.

Let us keep the feast.

LW

Are You Backed-Up?

Have you backed up your computer? Your site? Your Blog? Your life? Are you prepared to pick up the pieces after something goes wrong, and build something even better? Have you made sure you have the necessary pieces to do so?

LW

A Matter Of Perspective

By the things we so often think are important, last night was a disaster. I had company over and some of my housekeeping efforts were quickly set to naught by mud and gunk tracked in to coat the floor. I cooked a new meal, a recipe I had created just last Saturday, and rather spectacularly misjudged the cooking time by more than two hours. There were communications difficulties and differences in senses of humor, and things that reminded me I am now old . To cap the evening off, when we left to return them to their abode, there was a note on my door proclaiming to one and all that I had not paid my January water bill the current lair and that as a deadbeat I was subject to fines and legal actions. The recipe for disaster, right?

Wrong.

Last night was the most fun I have had in a long time. The young lady who bravely agreed to be my Guinea pig was a delight. The fact that English is not her native language was not a barrier nearly as much as a springboard for exploration as she explored American and I learned a bit more about Dutch. Humor that failed led to discussions of what lay behind events, and even into discussions of double meanings in both languages. I taught a bit about some cooking basics, and she shared tales of food from her home. She wasn't too scared of Souther food, so I shared a bit even as we waited and waited for the Orange Chicken with sourwood honey/Grand Marnier/chipotle glaze (and basmati rice, mushroom, almond, roast garlic stuffing). Not that she suffered too much, as I plied her with sweets, tea, bacon, and more to keep her strength up during the arduous wait.

We talked animals, from a duck named FiFi to a beagle named Ralph. We shared tales of the fascinating personalities and our thoughts on breeds and individuals. We talked about their career plans, research, and much more.

No, that was no disaster. It was simply one of the best times I have had in far too long, something I hope I managed to convey as I drove my very full and sleepy company back to their lair. It went in almost none of the ways I has planned or desired, and was so much the richer for it.

That thought has also mutated my anger at the letter at the end of the evening. I take more pride than I should in paying my debts, and that one was indeed paid. It was, in fact, paid almost two weeks before it was due, and therein lies part of the problem. Long story short, I paid when the bill arrived, not the way most do it. I also made the mistake of letting them run the payment the following day, for the convenience of the admin, who did so but lost their copy of the receipt, my copy of the receipt, and failed to log the payment into the accounting system. I have worked this issue with them, and even personally handed a copy of the transaction from my bank to the property manager. By my normal humor, I should be chewing up and spitting out nails this morning in righteous anger over what I regard as the gross incompetence of the AIMCO staff.

Wrong.

They are going to get a nastygram from me shortly, but I am almost laughing at this point. If they carry the farce further, it will go to the lawyers and I will come out well ahead as I can prove in court that it was paid, and that they were given proof of that several documentable times. No skin off my teeth, and indeed no reason for it to impact my day or life beyond the time it takes me to write the letter.

No, last night was a life lesson in many ways, about what is truly important. It is not schedules, perfection, or even public reputation. It is people, it is life, it is the opinion not of some artificial construct but that of individuals of worth. It is about explaining Moose and Squirrel to one who has never seen Rocky and Bullwinkle.

I go to share my day with some delightful wild and dangerous creatures and to immerse myself in what is truly important in life. In addition to time with the staff, I will even spend some time with the wolves. I may even try to find a copy of a good episode of The Adventures, maybe the Ruby Yaht, to share a bit more laughter, and groaning at the puns. It is to experience the joy of getting to know interesting people, no matter how many legs they have.

Think of your perspective this day, and how much richer and better life can be when you look at it in a different way.

LW

A Metaphor Given Life

The wolf mating season is well underway, and yesterday saw part of it in all its glory at Wolf Park. Despite what you may read, the social ranks of wolfdom are not nearly as rigid as some may say. Politics and individual preference are not the prerogative of just humans. In the main pack, the preferred mate of the Alpha female has always been the Beta Male, not the Alpha. She has never been shy about expressing this, and this year as seen her tie with the Beta several times now. The Beta, has somewhat mixed emotions, since the she has done her courting in front of the Alpha male, who is not fully happy with the situation.

Yesterday saw the latest tie, witnessed by all in part because it took place in the middle of the frozen lake. Now, for those not familiar with dogs or other canines, when mating they tie (courtesy of the knot) and can even stand end-to-end or side-by-side. Video of a previous Alpha Pair even shows them running side-by-side chasing down some pack members who had displeased them, while still tied. Left me with feelings of both inadequacy and admiration it did. What happened yesterday was enlightening on a different level.

The Alpha male came over and the Beta male immediately went over onto his back in submission, while still tied. The Alpha female, disdaining the Alpha male, moved off -- dragging the Beta along. I and some of the other males watching, besides wincing in sympathy, had to admit that this was the first time we had seen literally happen what we have seen figuratively. A person who thinks on a reflex level (or doesn't think at all) in regards relationships may well find themselves being dragged along by their privates as a result. Some food for thought for the day.

LW

The Sound Effects Of Our Lives

The last few weeks have been busy and very serious, both here and in real life. If you want an excellent serious food for thought post today, then go read this post. As for me, today is a day to laugh as it is the best medicine, and tastes a lot better than flue cure, apple cider vinegar, vitamins, and other remedies.

When I moved up to the new lair, I caught myself doing something I had been taught was not proper. I was making sounds. No, no, not those sounds, though they are a natural part of life. No, this was something far worse according to the polite codes by which I was raised.

These were grunts, groans, and other such noises as I did things. Like bending over. When it came to lifting and such, well, it got even better. The one I was doing most often was like that gruaon (a combination of grunt and groan) that Arnold makes when he is acting like he is lifting something heavy. You know, that noise he makes that sounds like he has been constipated for a month and is really straining hard because he thinks he might, just might, feel some movement.

How embarrassing. Proper gentlemen, especially proper young gentlemen, don't do that. Apparently I am in neither category anymore, because I do seem to be doing it. And other odd and interesting noises as well.

It is something that I am attempting to curb, as after 40 the body makes enough new and entertaining noises without adding to them.

So, what sound effects are you adding to those nature already provides your life? Are they truly the sound effects we want for our lives? You tell me.

LW

Some Food For Thought

VW at One Happy Dog Speaks has up what she calls a humor post. I laughed, but I also call it some very good food for thought. Enjoy.

LW

Honoring The Dead

My recent trip “home” to take care of the cemeteries brought to mind a debate I’ve been having with myself for a while now. To be honest, I am not sure there is any good or right answer to the debate. Yet, there are a number of things that deserve some thought and consideration as we enter the season.

Decorating the houses of the dead is an ancient practice that predates any current organized (or disorganized if you are an Episcopalian) religion. Many religions have a special day to clean and decorate, such as the Day of the Dead. The practice of putting evergreens and such on graves at this time of year has a long tradition going back to many “pagan” beliefs. It was a way of affirming life, and of honoring the dead.

In agrarian cultures, honoring the dead took on additional meaning because the dead were with them all the time. Tombs and cemeteries became more elaborate, and populations stayed in the same place. Even in frontier societies, this continued with the family plots on the family farm or claim. The dead were with us, and it was easy to show them honor at different times during the year.

We are no longer an agrarian society, and chunks – perhaps even significant chunks – of our population move around and away. The tombs of our loved ones are no longer easily available, and for those like me who were raised in the tradition of honoring the dead, it can pose a conundrum. How do we continue the tradition when we are no longer close by?

To begin to answer that, let’s look at some of the why tombs and such are decorated. In ancient times, the location of the body was felt in many cases to be an anchor point for the dead. It was where their spirit manifested, and that spirit was an entity to be feared as well as revered. The Romans were but one of many cultures and religions who prayed to their ancestors and felt that the spirits of the dead could bring good things or bad to the living. In this regard, it was a duty to the living as well as the dead to honor them as fully as possible.

Even when changing beliefs pushed this down a bit, the surface belief of showing respect to the dead requires easy access. The loss of that access was and is hard on some people, and history tells of those who failed to go to new lands and new opportunities so that family lands and family graves might be maintained.

Today, we have an added wrinkle in the mix of why we do things. In a time where people compete in decorating their homes for various holidays, there is a growing trend of carrying this to the houses of the dead.

So, if you decorate at the tombs of your dead, why do you do it? Is it to placate the spirits of the dead and entreat their blessings upon you? Do you do so as part of a competition, to show up your neighbors or other family members? Do you do it so that people, in particular family, will remember all those gone so that they live in that sense? Do you do it to truly honor them, or is it something you do for yourself either as penance or as an obligation? Do you do it because you believe deep down that they are there in that location?

Think on this a bit, and I may post more on my own internal debate later. The one thing I will suggest for today is that you show honor in other ways as well. Remember those gone with laughter and love. Think of the things they did at this time of year, remember the memories bright that can warm a heart as well as a room. Give that gift of memories to new generations, for that is a present that can be shared with all for generations to come.

LW