Having witnessed some idiocy above and beyond the call of duty of late (jaywalking is a major sport in this neck of the woods), I would like to offer the following guide to those confused by pedestrian signals.
White Figure: Is your friend. You may walk safely towards the light.
Flashing Orange/Red Figure: Run. Do not stand there talking to your girl, best bud, reading a book, or picking your nose. Run Forrest, Run!
Red Figure: Stop. Do not walk towards this figure, or you will die a slow, painful, and horrible death screaming in agony beyond comprehension. Everyone around will be glad it isn’t them, and then laugh at you for being stupid enough to walk out into traffic. Frankly, I will likely applaud the application of chlorine to the gene pool.
That said, it is likely to be traumatic on the person who crushes and drags you screaming down the street. It will be unsettling to those that have to scrape up what is left after your last agonized wail has passed.
So, my druthers would be for you to get a brain and a clue, and not walk towards the red figure so as to avoid trauma to innocent parties. Then again, if you weren’t a clueless idiot/self-centered self-absorbed jerk, you probably wouldn’t have walked out there anyway. No loss if you do, but hard on those that have to deal with the aftermath.
Grump.
LW
